OF COURSE IT’S FLORIDA: Man Gets DUI INSIDE of Walmart

You just have to love Florida.  This is one of the most unique places in America, which puts it pretty high on the list of unique places worldwide, and the stories that come out of the Sunshine State are some of the wildest that you’ll ever come across.

Maybe it’s the constant, oppressive heat, or whatever sort of strange ennui that comes from living in place with constantly shifting bands of tourists, but there are headlines that come out of Florida that you may not ever see anywhere else on the planet.

This week was no exception.

A Florida Man is behind bars on DUI charges for allegedly drunk driving a motorized scooter inside a Walmart where he nearly struck shoppers and crashed into shelves and merchandise displays, police report.

And on the sabbath, no less.

Aaron Gregory, 39, was busted around 10 AM Sunday inside a Walmart in Melbourne, a city about 65 miles south of Orlando. Officers were summoned to the store “reference to an intoxicated male on a motorized scooter,” according to an arrest affidavit.

A Walmart security official told cops that Gregory, seen at right, was haphazardly driving a Walmart scooter “down the aisles, running into shelves and displays, and creating a danger for other patrons by almost striking them with the scooter.”

Gregory could be facing some serious trouble:

Gregory was charged with four misdemeanors, including driving under the influence, disorderly intoxication, and possession of an open container of alcohol. He is being held in the Brevard County jail in lieu of $3000 bond.

The tipsy Floridian was reportedly so drunk that he had to be removed from the scene on a stretcher, and an open bottle of Smirnoff Vodka was found in the basket of the motorized scooter.

Thankfully, no one was injured in the incident.

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